Letting go

The story of the "Prodigal"son or daughter is one of the best stories in the new testament. It involves the letting go of children as they rebel or want to be free of the training, wisdom, or love parents have. It is a coming of age story that all of us go through although we may not understand it as such. The story is simple: son asks for inheritance, father gives the inheritance, son leaves, goes broke; comes back home and the father is excited for it. That sums it up in the nutshell. There are many interpretations of this story and the point of this writing is not theological but personal. I have been in a struggle of letting go as a parent. For years I have tried to the best of my ability and sense to raise two children in the age of madness. They are basically good persons. My daughter (both by adoption) has a wonderful personality, my son a loner. Both did reasonably well in school and due to the economy have been sporadic in working.


The point is when does parenting stop? How do we let go especially when we see our children going down the path of hurt and danger. Jesus said that we would never give our children any thing dangerous nor forsake them, but in the larger sense what do we do?? This is difficult for me. I have strive to be there understand and in cases help bind up wounds. However, it seems to fall on closed ears. The behavior is unsteady bordering on disrespect. The willfulness is unstable and debilitates all young people. And explanations pale in comparison.

However a suggestion was offered to me by a person I met in Starbucks. His suggestion to the issues facing young people revolved around video games. The matter was interesting: that decisions made by the young are more complicated than we know. Their comprehension of time is real or on going.That when we confront the process used to solve problems they are actuall in real or ongoing time. This is not how we think. Few of us are answering the question: what are we doing ...NOW, or looking at you tube or have the slightest idea of going viral. They do. And we are loosing the influence we need to shape them because of our lack of attention. I know this personally. And although I have a relationship with my adult children, it is not as it should be. The rerasons are difficult to speak on, but suffice it to say that all parents have a falling out before a falling in. My hope is that the fall out is temporarty and repairable before it is too late. Later