What is Important?

This is a question that all of us have had to wrestle with as we age. During our lives many people have told us certain things that are considered important and believing them these pieces of advise have affected our lives. As young people we are overwhelmed by those who give us advise and demand that we listen. As Bill Withers would say "it is their appointed duty".
Parents the first to give advise tell us how to behave, act, comport ourselves. For them character is important, respect is important, family loyalty is important; and this is reinforced with various boards of education!! The reason being that as we grow and leave the nest we will have an arsenal of arrows to live in a society of rules.


Teachers on the other hand, stress the importance of education. That good grades, good choices for college will prepare us for life: the participation as productive persons able to contribute to the betterment of the society we live in.


Pastors are those who carry the moral teachings to a community of believers. The golden rule, the commandments, an ethic of Christendom develop the fabric of living for the time of the end: when all the lives are weighed in the balance and those who are lacking are condemned. And they claim its importance and encourage membership that forsakes not the gathering of themselves. Again the question returns was this important?

To be honest it bothers me, all of these foundations of my early life. As I approach 60, and after being a good son, a productive person paying taxes, a responsible parent, a loving father and husband (although my wife would disagree, which is why after 24 years we are divorcing), and not only a disciple of Christ, but, a carrier of the word as a pastor:I still find myself in a struggle with this question and I ask myself: why?? Why, after all of the absorption, the admonishments, the efforts to be all we can be; after laying the foundations for those we encounter, raise and counsel. After all the teachings at various levels, the forgetfulness in our own lives ( the sins of omissions and commission) and yes the rules we break daily there seems to be an extreme irony: that Life gets in the way. No matter what we learn, experience live through; no matter what our parents, grandparents, family members say to us: No matter the advise from bosses, managers or supervisors, or the wives or husbands or siblings we are not ready for the living life extends to us.


We live each day in anticipation of what is next. My dad would say that life is just life and sigh saying that when I reach my 50's I would understand. Well guess what I am over 50 and there are things still beyond me.. not much but a few. In fact the one thing I have learned is this: life is damn hard to live.


We structure life around rules we demand they be followed, and we have the resources to make persons pay for ignoring them. We have more jails, penitentiaries, half -way houses then other society. We will make you pay. We have more restrictions on your ability to be reinstated in society than other nations: we make them pay. In fact I have observed we as a people are so ridged that we can not see the grey only the black or the white. And we have selective enforcement.

We teach the rules of society do not lie, cheat, steal nor tolerate those who do, and we have examples of those who do and they are rewarded. We say do not covet yet nations have built their nationalism by war killing and melding the territories of those who are the losers under the sayings: "To the Victors go the spoils or manifest destiny". Jingoism and nationalism and xenophobia enable nations to enslave, confiscate and rob helpless persons of property and possessions. Yet we are full of songs of deep patriotism extolling virtue for future generations. Is this what is important?

The answer is yes and no. It is important that we have foundations, no persons or society at large can function without them. However, the real answer lies in those who have made the effort to struggle with life itself. That is the key. It is a given that the answer to life questions do not materialize, if they did we would buy the book and do better. The challenge of living as I have found is in the trying, failing and rising. A friend of mine recently reminded me of this recently. That is why it is good to have friends. Friends that first and last will tell you truth. The fact is there have been answers to the questions and everyday we live we have the opportunity to perfect ourselves. Mistakes, visions, thoughts all change: this is the gift of living. Our attitudes shift, we look at the world (our section of it) with a different mind than we did years ago. Our success is measured by failure, yes failure because it is in the failure, missing the mark or falling down (for the religious:SIN) makes us grow. This is important. growing is the seed corn of life, the rod of measurement that we will be judged by. So what is important the ability to to be bloodied but unbowed, to still be here and to tell the story; to understand the Elders in "Roots" as they welcomed a new child with the words" behold the only thing greater than yourself." Later